Alas! How woeful is the life of an artist, subject to scorn and mockery alike. Some would even say “mockery” is a subset of “scorn” and the Woeful Artist is being redundant. Yea, troubled indeed, this path I have chosen! Hark, now, whilst I regale you with a True-Life Story of Sorrow.
Like many of you, I rely on caffeine to guide me through the morning, a comforting angel made of sweet, sweet chemicals. But this angel, she is fickle, and to summon her requires a vessel. So it is the habit of me and my officemates to bring in coffee mugs to contain the nourishing spirit.
I possess a modest assortment of such mugs; but being a kindly soul, I sometimes admit a new one to my cabinets, if it please me. And a few weeks ago, whilst in Hobby Lobby, I happened across methought the manliest coffee mug I had ever seen:
But what did my co-workers say about this wonder, this veritable tower of masculinity? Would you believe, dear hypothetical reader, they mocked? They dubbed it Fancy Mug, and threatened to smash it (literally) on the hard, pointy rocks of reality (metaphor). Woe, say I, woe!
If you, too, are a Struggling Artist, you know all too well the pain of a Dream Derided. The beauty in one’s mind receives no meet greeting from a cold and pedestrian world. Oft times, the Artist, being of delicate temper and questionable fortitude, may find it most expedient simply to crumple under pressure, abandon the dream, and give over to the dreary path prescribed by the jeering crowd.
Did I, you ask, give over to the aforementioned pressure, and select a container more amenable to the sneering crowd?
Nay, good hypothetical reader, nay, a thousand times nay! Forsooth, I embraced Fancy Mug, held it aloft, and turned back those contemptuous darts with a heedless laugh and a jovial disposition! For oft may it be that a name given in scorn remains as a laurel. And as for me, I shall hold up Fancy Mug, drink deep from the hot black caffeinated goodness of my dreams, and recite the time-honored creed of Artists from time immemorial:
Have an excellent Monday and an outstanding week.
Brian D. Buckley 
For my part, I think that mug is awesome.
Please forgive my foreign way of speaking. I forgot my Shakespearean code book in my other pants.
Yeah, I think I forgot mine too. 😉 Thanks for supporting Fancy Mug! I am totally bringing that up with the haters tomorrow.
Hang on, gotta get my hate on!
I wouldn’t call it especially manly, or unmanly. It does, however, look as though two different people created it. The mug’s body and decoration appear to be the products of a master craftsman, while the lip and handle remind me of the clay ashtray I generated in middle school art class. Nonetheless, as a guy who often drinks his coffee out of a Mickey Mouse mug with his name on it, I shall not cast stones.