I think this is the best poem I’ve ever written. It’s a sort of paean to the space shuttle. I wrote it back in 2005, when the shuttles were still flying.
Liftoff
The countdown closes quick upon the point
When hydrogen and steel will push as one
And will with flame tumultuously anoint
That beast which looks with envy on the sun.
A light! Two hundred decibels explode
The crowd exhales – a thousand boiling winds
Surround the glowing column and its load:
The shuddering leviathan ascends.
And up – and up – the azure curtain parts –
The well of black, ablaze with powdered snow
Reverberates through fresh-elated hearts –
The panoramic arc unfolds below;
And passing into silence with a sigh
The falcon skirts the surface of the sky.
I never got to see a shuttle launch, and now I never will.
Did you ever see one? Would you want to?
Brian D. Buckley 
I really like it. It took me a couple reads through to put it together in my mind, but it’s very beautiful. I like the words you’ve used, like tumultuously and leviathan. I’ve always wished I could better put words like those into my writing, but I never think of them while I’m writing something, and trying to shove them in afterwards just because I want to use them ends up sounding really awkward and strange. Perhaps they still need to be assimilated into my vernacular.
And, no, I’ve never seen a shuttle launch, and I don’t really want to. I’d rather read a book about it.
Thanks Evlora! I struggle a lot with the line between simple, natural-sounding language, and “higher,” more formal/poetic language. I’m glad this one worked for you.
You’re right about trying to shove words in after the fact – it’s awkward, and doesn’t work very well. My advice would be to just write naturally. The more you read, the more your working vocabulary will grow, and you’ll begin to incorporate those new words naturally too. As you said – assimilating them into your vernacular. 😉
“CountDown”
Lit up with anticipation
We arrive at the launching site
The sky is still dark, nearing dawn
On the Florida coastline
Circling choppers slash the night
With roving searchlight beams
This magic day when super-science
Mingles with the bright stuff of dreams
Floodlit in the hazy distance
The star of this unearthly show
Venting vapours, like the breath
Of a sleeping white dragon
Crackling speakers, voices tense
Resume the final count
All systems check, T minus nine
As the sun and the drama start to mount
The air is charged
A humid, motionless mass
The crowds and the cameras,
The cars full of spectators pass
Excitement so thick you could cut it with a knife
Technology…high, on the leading edge of life
The earth beneath us starts to tremble
With the spreading of a low black cloud
A thunderous roar shakes the air
Like the whole world exploding
Scorching blast of golden fire
As it slowly leaves the ground
Tears away with a mighty force
The air is shattered by the awesome sound
Like a pillar of cloud
The smoke lingers high in the air
In fascination
With the eyes of the world
We stare…
At first I thought you had written that, before I googled it and found the Rush lyrics. Very cool nonetheless.