…which, unlike the original Ten Commandments, are numbered:
- Never read the comments on a news story.
- If you read the comments on a news story, never, ever argue with the commenters.
- Be weird. Don’t be evil. Know the difference.
- Credit your source. Recognition is the currency of the Internet. Well, and sometimes money.
- Stay away from 4chan. If you don’t know what 4chan is, keep it that way.
- Beware of groupthink. The question is not whether you’re doing it, but how much.
- Don’t have anything on your website that auto-plays audio or video when the page loads. Don’t have popup ads. Don’t create a list of fifty things with every thing on a separate page. And by the way, if the first “content” I find on your site is a full-page window asking what I think of your site, you’re not going to like the answer.
- Self-promote in moderation. And don’t beg. It’s embarrassing.
- Remember that on rare occasions, information from the Internet has been known to be false.
- Don’t be a dick.
#11, DON’T TYPE IN ALL CAPS! But maybe that’s part of being a dick.
That’s a good #11. And the all-cappers aren’t always jerks – a surprising number of people do this out of sheer cluelessness.
That’s the pic I e-mailed Whirlpool when they asked what was wrong. They were pretty cool about it.
“Don’t create a list of fifty things with every thing on a separate page.”
In fact, don’t post a list of fifty things. Pick the best ones. Edit ruthlessly. Kill your darlings. Get it down to 25. Or, or preferably, 12-14. Maybe ten.
I still remember a classic piece of click-bait I saw once. “Ten famous writers who are really dicks,” or some such. Each on a separate page, of course, with JK Rowling last, to make sure you click through all ten. Each classified as a dick based on one event.
The funny one was Hemingway, who was classified as a dick because he was married four times. Now, Papa really was a dick, and anybody who does even some basic research can find much more persuasive evidence than his four marriages. 🙂
I’ll admit I think of Norman Mailer as a dick based on one event. But that one event was stabbing his wife, so I figure it’s reasonably justified.
Maybe his wife was a dick.