If you know me irl, chances are you’ve already been subjected to some of these jokes. If you haven’t yet had that dubious honor, well, this post might convince you to keep it that way.
Last week there was this great party for functions. All the famous functions were invited, like sin(x) and |x|. Well, 2^x happened to notice that her good buddy e^x was sitting all by himself, looking lonely and miserable. She said, “Hey, e^x, why don’t you integrate yourself into this party?” But e^x just shook his head and replied, “It wouldn’t make any difference!”
Hey, baby. I wish I were f'(x), cuz I’d love to be tangent to those curves.
Leibniz and Newton had a long-running dispute over which of them had discovered calculus. Leibniz claimed his work was entirely original, but Newton thought it was somewhat…derivative?
You’re welcome, Internet.