Monthly Archives: May 2019

• Clean.
• On time.
• Happy.

Pick any two.

Last night I texted my good friend Benjamin R. Trube, Esq., III, and mentioned that I was feeling a bit sick and going to bed early. (Don’t worry, I’m fine.) He texted me back “Feel better soon.”

He could’ve stopped there. No one would’ve blamed him for it.

But, because he is Benjamin R. Trube, Esq., IV, he went the extra mile and followed up with this:

At least you’re not a 14 year old boy forced to fight in a giant biomechanical robot for a dad who abandoned you.

And you know what?

He’s right.

Thank you, Benjamin R. Trube, Esq., V.

P.S. He’s referencing Neon Genesis Evangelion, but part of me thinks it’s funnier without the context.

Every day, after his nap, Evan gets to watch 15-20 minutes of videos, usually on YouTube. Past favorites have included scenes from Frozen and various animations of “Wheels on the Bus.” Lately he’s been watching a bunch of low-budget CG videos that he calls “colors” because they feature brightly colored balls, eggs, shapes, animals, and other assorted oddities performing surreal actions accompanied by perky music. The videos are very … what’s the word? … dumb.

One song they sing over and over is:

Red color, red color,
Where are you?
Here I am, here I am,
How do you do?

Then they iterate through various other colors (e.g., “Orange color, orange color”). He pronounces the last line “How do a do?” and corrects anyone who differs.

So that’s been in his head. Also, separately, he’s been reading his children’s Bible. At first he didn’t care about anything but David and Goliath (mostly Goliath), but gradually he started getting interested in the New Testament as well. And of course we’ve been talking with him about the stories there. So that’s been in his head too.

All that is just to explain why, earlier this week, completely unprompted, he invented and sang the following for Betsy and me:

Jesus color, Jesus color,
Where are Jesus?
Here I am, here I am,
How do a Jesus?

Look, I’m just gonna say it. This is by far the best new Christian music in the last thirty years.

Have a good weekend!